Generational Leftovers; You can just go ahead and dump those out, they are way expired!

Nov 05, 2020

You are probably thinking, “What the hell are generational leftovers? Recipes from my Grandma?” Well, they could be like recipes but nowhere near what you are thinking.

Generational Leftovers: Customs, beliefs, habits, and rules that are passed down from the generation before you, that no longer align with who you are presently in life. These leftovers are stale and need to be detoxed or tweaked to give you more power towards your goals and dream life.

Generational leftovers can trickle down into your world through your family (especially parents because they are our role models) and, or society.

Side Note: These leftovers are not your parent’s fault. They were just teaching you what they knew. In the past, there were not the millions of options that we have at our fingers tip now.

The reason I am so passionate about this topic, and I am taking the time to write this article is because we can be the change. We can make a conscious choice to detox the old ways and bring fresh ideas to our world. Of course, the new customs, beliefs, habits, and rules we make, will someday become leftovers, and the next group of epic humans can transform them! It’s like I am trying to start a system to always keep upgrading our ideas and beliefs while never getting stuck.

Want to join me in getting rid of those stinky, old, maybe rotten leftovers?

These leftovers have probably gone through many generations so they can be so deep that you don’t even recognize them or feel them. Some examples of generational leftovers are;

Racism, inequality, religious beliefs, daily habits, emotions, human interactions, routines, products you use, rules, and limiting beliefs.

How do you throw out all your generational leftovers?

Here is the game plan:

  1. Honestly identify all your generational leftovers. Think about all the customs, beliefs, habits, and rules you have lived by your whole life. Write each one down. Then you will go back through and decide which ones still align with the Queen you are, and which ones need to be thrown out.
  2. Discover the origin story for each leftover. Everything has a story, and by giving your generational leftovers an origin, you are allowing yourself to fully release it from your life. We don’t want any residue left behind from these leftovers, or they will grow like mold all over your Queendom. You might need to become a detective to discover these origin stories because remember I said these leftovers can go very deep. Ask your parents how their parents acted or what rules they had in their household growing up. When did these customs, beliefs, rules, and habits become passed down to you? Who started them or who passed them directly to you (usually, this is when your primary caretakers come into play)?
  3. Create a new rule book. Now, this is the fun part! You have experienced and evolved through this life thus far. You have so much wisdom about what is right for you through your feminine intuition, past experiences, and personal interactions. Through this process of ‘cleaning up shop,’ you have made that beautiful space for your new Rule Book to come to life. Take those old generational leftovers and make the conscious move to turn them into a new Queen rule, habit, belief, or custom.

To give you a clear picture of this process, I want to take you through the journey of one of my leftovers that I recently threw out.

One of the generational leftovers that were holding me back from my dream life was the belief that struggling equaled accomplishment. Everything was a struggle growing up for my family. My mom felt accomplished if she struggled and got all the bills paid that month. My dad felt accomplished if he drove the struggling three hours to pick us up every other week. My siblings and I felt accomplished if we struggled to make the household run smoothly so that my mom’s boyfriend wouldn’t wreak havoc on all of us.

This belief carried on into my college years. I struggled to work 60 hours while going to school, which completely burnt my mind and body out at an early age of 20. This didn’t even phase me to slow down because the struggle was an accomplishment, I thought.

Then my life turned into a fairy-tale. I met my soul mate, who was an accomplished man, and he told me to stop struggling. He wanted to support me and all my dreams. This all felt way too easy for me, so of course, I pushed away his support for many years. I kept struggling because that was the only way to the top, right?

After becoming a coach and doing the internal mapping of my brain, I discovered that this belief of struggling was a generational leftover. It was holding me back from all my big ideas that were needing to come out into the world. This leftover was passed down to my mother from her catholic mother who had 12 children (the struggle was real in that household.) This generational leftover was deep. I believe it went as far back as my ancestors coming over from Ireland. Of course, they had to struggle to make accomplishments a thing. There was a famine, and it was freaking 1850.

As an influential female leader in the 21st century, it was time to let go of this old belief. The new Queen belief that I made was, “Accomplishment equals doing something that brings pleasure to my life!” If I completed a project, business plan, idea, or adventure while feeling immense pleasure, then that was a substantial accomplishment for me. Yes, I could still have moments of struggle, but then I aim to quickly turn that around to pleasure. I get creative and don’t let the battle define my accomplishment like a negative, sad girl would. I’m a fierce Queen who only accepts positive light.

See how I honestly identified this generational leftover, gave it an origin story, and then made my new Rule Book around this belief. There are still people from my past or family who don’t understand this belief. They still believe that nothing can come easy in life, and me living so freely is going to bite me in the ass someday. I didn’t struggle to reach the top, so obviously, I didn’t gain anything from their old generational perspective.

Mt statement back to their judgment is, “I learn about every part of my Queendom through pleasure. This allows me to discover all my power to use towards any struggle that pops up along my journey. You can learn more from the pleasure then you can from any struggle. I have clarity now and nothing is holding me back!”

That generational leftover was a big one, but they won’t all be so deep and so big. Some of your leftovers might be as small as negative self-talk or eating bread at every meal. It doesn’t matter how much they impact your life; it only matters that you throw them out to make room for the beautiful Queen you are craving to become.

I would like to write an entire book on this topic one day, but for now, I will start here. Share this concept with everyone! Let’s start fresh together. Comment below and tell me one of your generational leftovers so you can release it out into the world! I would love to connect further on this topic.

With love & support,

Feminine Empowerment Coach & Integrative Health Practitioner

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